Thursday, February 3, 2011

CALGON Take ME AWAY!!!!

Came home from work to find A) Grumpy Bear aka Hubby had worked his tail end off ALL DAY and was well,  grumpy extremely tired and exhausted.  And his accomplishment - he got the water back on!  Only to have the pressure switch on the well quit..........................................

Now I may be a Bear of Very Little Brain but the ONE THING I've learned living Sixty Miles North of Nowhere is to keep an extra Pressure Switch (and maybe two) on hand!!  (Pat myself on the back here. Note - replace it TOMORROW)


The whole house has....well,,,,,er....an aroma.  Like a still plugged sewer line, like a decaying frozen whale in the bathroom.  You know it smells like shit not exactly like an air freshener.   I need a semi load of Febreeze.

The bathroom commode (along with every other drain in the house) is still non-functioning, nada, zip, zilch, ZERO, FROZEN shut.  So even though we at least have livestock water, we cannot use it in the house............................oh well.

Perhaps tomorrow said Pollyanna.

And on that end I did discover NOW was not the time to say "And how did your day go, Dear?" Nah, I didn't do that.  I KNOW better. Ever notice how we as young brides were prone to do stupid crap like that?  Not anymore....with wisdom comes age. The only damn benefit to getting old.
 I tell him I was a good investment - I grew every year!!!!! I
am twice the woman I was in 1973. Come to think of it, it was 
below zero the day this picture was taken.  
Doesn't it EVER Warm up in Wyoming???
NOPE.


Well I have to go -- outside---quite literally....give me a minute.

Ah back now.  Which brings up a question, what do eskimos do?  Do they have an igloo outhouse?  Is it white inside????   Hmmmm inquiring minds want to know.  And how do they keep from getting butt cheek frostbite?  I would think that could be one situation where 'layering' clothing was NOT your friend.  Think of trying to pull up all those layers in a hurry at 50 below.....I'd get mixed up and walk like a hog-tied penguin for the rest of the day.

But I digress. Eskimos have their own problems and I have mine.

I have noticed how my page visits have SHOT UP since my shitter quit.  Is this the secret to blogging success?  Are you all tuned in to see if I will survive the lack of a commode?

Or slap the crap out of Grumpy Bear and blame him like that dysfunctional chick on Teen Mom? It's your fault Gary. It's your fault Gary.  Gimme a break here Amber.

Maybe I have the material here for a new sitcom.  Two People and A Half Commode.  Well in our case it is still NO Commode.

Seriously, I do find the event of having my own waste come up in my bathtub rather distasteful.  Thank you very much Rotten Miserable Power Company.  You might think you had me fooled with your nice timely phone recorded messages. "Our power crews are working on the problem.  We are aware of the outage in the your area and 320 customers are affected.  We estimate your power will be restored at __________(pick a time because they ALWAYS called back and extended it another two hours)."

And 18 hours later - "Your power should have been restored at 2:47 pm.  If not, please call this number.  This outage was caused by SNOW."  WHAT????  What snow - we had only gotten about an inch at this point.  Your system cannot take an inch of snow? Or 13 below zero which is common at North of Nowhere? 

Oh yeah, I forgot.  As your recorded messages came in on my phone, at first it was 320 households without power, then 120, then finally 27 --- AH HA.  That's the number of users on MY FEEDER LINE - My 60 year old feeder line (I kid you not folks, the power line was built in the early 1950's. I still cannot believe they charged us almost $10,000 for 3 spans 10 years ago to hook into that crap piece of line).  And you guys just told me you traced the entire outage to that line in a 1" SNOWSTORM!!

Here's a clue Rotten Miserable Power Company - maybe you need to REPLACE that line. (I used to work for a power company that built private power lines so I know a thing or two here guys.  You need to get up earlier to pull the wool over my eyes.  I didn't fall off the tomato truck yesterday you know.)

Well the blogging adventure continues....thanks for all your comments guys.  I read every one of them several times and tell myself, ah ha, someone else has gone through this.  They lived through it, and so shall I.

I will do as they say - "TIE A KNOT IN THE ROPE"



(Only I will be on the other end of it - you know who Power Company will be on this end).

6 comments:

  1. Meridth, I know you are truly going through shit, but damn, this did make me laugh. been there myself when we have below zero temps for a week and the blizzard and then flooding and then extreme cold in '93, '96, and '06. My condolances and prayers.

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  2. Hummmmm....reminds me of the aftermath of Hurricane Francis in south FL....14 days without power or water...but....NO SNOW...!!!...hang in there..is gott'a get better....

    Life is Good

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  3. Helga - no, no not going through shit, trying to do without shitting. :) thanks compadre! It's not my first rodeo either. And at least I missed Hurricane Francis!

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  4. Oh no..time to get out a five gallon pail and make a comfy potty that you can dump..if you have an old toilet seat you could avoid the rings the bucket makes on your butt. Just don't tip it over as you get up. I hope you get your sewer unfrozen soon..what a shitty position to be in..although you made me wonder about the Eskimos:(

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  5. Merideth, I think we all got a chuckle from your misery. We have been there but mostly with floods. One year it got so very, very cold 38 below and lots of snow but we had floods almost every year and when your septic tank is 3 ft under water it tends not to work. Don't hold it too long or you might bust a gut. You know that colic surgery is spendy. Take care and thinking about you.

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  6. You have made me feel guilty today when I read you still don't have plumbing. When my husband is belly-aching about nonstop winter weather problems on our place, I am going to read this to him. Actually the whole series of posts about your "adventure". Maybe a stuck tractor, froze up corral waterers or a broken cross link on a tire chain won't seem so bad!

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